FOREWORD

The title of this post suggested an America Soap Opera: “Days of Our Lives” - for it’s debut in the year 1965. From my knowledge I think the show is still on going. The word “back” at the end of the title means it back in my blog post as it was 1 of the title I used in my blogspot, that lasted up to 10 episode. Reading back those post make me wanna laugh at myself, thinking that the girl I used to love is the one that I really want to be with and saying music is truly what I like to do and many more. I guess it was youngster thinking, Im still young anyway. =P
As a person grows, environment changes, things changes, the people he meet, expands and his way of thinking changes. So each moment of the thought(s) written down during that period, reflects the person at the moment, not his entire live.
Just like the opening title of the Soap Opera suggested:  
“Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our lives.”

Just as I read through those drafts post that I have in my dashboard, here’s one I didn’t post it and I don’t know why. It should be posted on the date 28th December 2008.

TITLED: a letter you won’t get to read.
got much to say to you, but no where to start.
you wont or maybe you would read this
time really really flies.
how are you?
there’s really so much things/feelings to say to you
but it just can’t be put into words
i guess everything has fade away as time goes.
I’m no longer the man that I was
you are my best girl still, but
the feeling for you has change to another
to what? I don’t know. But definitely not love.

Too much to say, too hard to put into words
I’ll just cut it till here
praying for your happiness each time
and i hope you are now
Happy sweet 20th birthday to you =D

Loves,
from Me

a letter for you
it wont be sent

it was just a small intro to this episode of  “ Days of our lives ”.  this goes to show things that we forgotten to do/solve, will always come back to us in any other point of our lives.

I laughed at myself reading your thoughts. Yes, I read. And I wonder why am I laughing at myself, or I actually do know why. And each time I read, I just felt like a fool, seriously. I’m a fool all along anyway. =)

I pondered, if it was our moment, what is on your thoughts. How I wished I could read in the past. Knowing how you feel and all. But now I know, how you feel, but not for me. I’m glad that you found the one love, I’m serious. Just like what I had written in the post for your bday – praying for your happiness. I’m always wishing that he’ll love you more than I do, or at least, love you more than you love him.

Not that I still wished you would be mine, but the feeling that you feel him more where he ain’t treating you right, it just ARGH, no word can describe. Or maybe he does treat you right ever since patched. But well, from what I can read from your thoughts, this song best and suit you the most now. A song by westlife: ” I wanna grow old with you”. It definitely represent what you are feeling now…towards him. =)

Yup, maybe this song might represent my feelings for you, but it would not be this moment now. 
Maybe 1 or 2 years back, I’ll feel this song badly, not today.
Many asked me:  ”Do you still love her?”, “You still love her right?”, “Are you still waiting for her?”
Sometimes I think I have moved on, other times not. But I asked myself, do I still feel the same for her now like how I did 3years back? Answer is no.. I clearly know that, the girl that I love or once loved, was the Her - 3 years back. So people asked me do I still loves her, Yes I do, but is the girl I knew 3 years back, who once loved me too. 

It may seemed contradicting, Like I don’t feel for her but yet I still do. But if you ever understand what I’m trying to say..good. if nope, no point explaining. =)  Many would start thinking at this point of time reading, “aiyo, Jun wei still living in the past, why hasn’t he moved on?”. Well, that’s how you think not me. To me, this is just talking out like how you are reminiscing your good old childhood days or any happy moment of your life with your friends during supper night out.

She’s like a complete stranger to me. I think I don’t even know who she is now.

Maybe people would think,  ”So if he have moved on, then why he can’t find a new girl? ”. Moved on is one issue,  but finding one that could replace the love once so strong isnt easy. Maybe I still do compare.. or I’m picky, can’t find one that I can compromise the character of the girl. Or worst case scenario, I’m fated to be alone? Laughed! (Can’t used the word bachelor as society usually defines a man with good terms but unmarried. I don’t have any good term to start with. Laughed.)

I remember last time when I don’t even have any r/s experience and my friends broke up with their bf, I used to console them with my own philosophical words. And I quoted an old way of consoling: ” Time would heal”. Yes, it definitely. but everyone takes different length of time. Everyone got different karma anyway. =) I guess next time when the love is replaced by someone else, and I read back all the post I’ve wrriten for/about her, I would be laughing. Just like how I laughed at the posts I’ve written bout the girl I fell in love for during secondary school. And maybe one day I would be telling my kids, how devoted(stupid) I was. Laughed..

I shall end this new debut episode of  ” Days of our lives ” by dedicating the song I mentioned for you plus an Sensei Guidance. and I’ll be still praying for her and everyone else happiness and growth! =)
Bye people, and this sure is a long enough update for people who asked me to..Now who would say I didnt update. LOL..
Stay tuned for episode 2 and more..

PS: sorry for the singlish and lousy grammar and everything. this is me..

” The important thing is to overcome the sorrow that accompanies any type of separation, such as death or divorce. The vital thing is to continue advancing. Do not look back. Just forge on. There are many reasons why people bid farewell to one another. People have their own thoughts and situations. The deep scars within your heart may not heal quickly. Yet brace yourself so you can look forward. You should strive to move on, cutting through the clouds in your heart. As long as you advance, new hope will be born. The sun will rise. Only when you continue to advance can you encounter an even better, more wonderful you. ”

Another day
Without your smile
Another day just passes by
But now I know
How much it means
For you to stay
Right here with me

The time we spent apart will make our love grow stronger
But it hurt so bad I cant take it any longer

I wanna grow old with you
I wanna die lying in your arms
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna be looking in your eyes
I wanna be there for you
Sharing everything you do
I wanna grow old with you

A thousand miles between us now
It causes me to wonder how
Our love tonight remains so strong
It makes our risk right all along

The time we spent apart will make our love grow stronger
But it hurt so bad I cant take it any longer

I wanna grow old with you
I wanna die lying in your arms
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna be looking in your eyes
I wanna be there for you
Sharing everything you do
I wanna grow old with you

Things can come and go I know but
Baby I believe
Somethings burning strong between us
Makes it clear to me

I wanna grow old with you
I wanna die lying in your arms
I wanna grow old with you
I wanna be looking in your eyes
I wanna be there for you
Sharing everything you do
I wanna grow old with you